1) I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.
2) CEO's are now playing miniature golf.
3) Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children's names.
4) A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico .
5) Dick Cheney took his stockbroker hunting.
6) Motel Six won't leave the light on anymore.
7) The Mafia is laying off judges.
8) Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.
And, finally....
9) I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I called the Suicide Lifeline. I got a call center in Pakistan , and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck!
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